More than 100 events take place as part of the festival, which is particularly embraced by those with Mexican and Spanish roots. Celebrations range from flower shows to battles of the bands to parades. Some events are held in sacred places, including Alamo Square and La Villita — the city’s historic arts village and first neighborhood — and others in balmy backyards.

One popular celebration takes place on Monday night. Embellished river barges meander along the waterway with city officials and leaders on board. The riverfront where spectators gather is converted to a child-friendly park: amid the folding chairs and oak trees are cascarones — eggshells that have been filled with confetti and sealed with pastel-colored paper — that children can crack over one another’s heads, sending bits of blue, green, and neon pink bursting into the air.

But many of the parade’s traditions remain intact. Texas women donning yellow dresses still run it. And the city still appoints a king and queen of April merrymaking, a custom that dates back to the 19th century. “King Antonio” reigns over the city for a year, riding in cavalcades and on floats, his blue military attire festooned with glittering medals. He shares the spotlight with the “Rey Feo” — the people’s King — who is meant to be a counterpart to an aloof Spanish monarch. And flanked by the Queen, who, along with other young San Antonio women, make their debut during Fiesta in hand-beaded dresses, replete with 12-foot long trains and headpieces that  can weigh upwards of 50 pounds.

For all its regal pageantry, Fiesta is democratic in spirit. Its events are open to all comers, and many are sponsored by nonprofits and military organizations seeking to raise funds for scholarships and charitable causes. Rey Feo candidates compete to raise $150,000, for example, and the Texas Cavaliers donate net proceeds from the River Parade to their charitable foundation.

In Manuel Antonio, travelers do more than observe nature: they engage it. Along the Pacific coast of Central America, adventure-lovers encounter some of the planet’s most prolific wildlife.

The journey begins outside of San José, where winding roads lead travelers to a bridge above the Tárcoles River. Along its muddied banks are gargantuan crocodiles fattened by daily ranger feedings, seemingly immobilized. After snapping photographs of these behemoth beasts, you’ll continue towards the Pacific Ocean, but little time will pass before wildlife summons you again.

Scarlet macaws perch on treetops, their vibrant hues stunning against the backdrop of low, interweaving gray clouds. Nearby are monkeys and sloths, slowly creeping through the trees. Within hours, Costa Rica earns its name: With 5% of the Earth’s biodiversity, the small country is also one of the most bountiful.

During my trip, I bunked at the Gaia Hotel and Reserve, a haven of luxury beside the well-preserved Manuel Antonio National Park. The region’s natural beauty had already begun to restore me, and additional energy came from Gaia’s staff, friendly locals who finish every sentence with “pura vida.”

Facebook erupts with the Dowager’s pithy one-liners every Sunday evening, reiterating the show’s success among American viewers. Now fully obsessed, we have to wonder: can fans tour Highclere Castle, the real-life estate where the BBC films the series?

The answer is yes, if you plan months in advance! The castle is currently closed to the public (it’s a private residence, naturally) but slated to reopen its magnificent doors this July. According to Discover England Tours, summer tours go on sale during early February 2013.

*Find out more about the castle and filming of the series here.
*See how you can reserve tour tickets here.
*Eager to visit a spot like Highclere before summer arrives? Consider a day trip to Warwick Castle (under 2 hours); Blenheim Palace (Churchill’s birthplace reopens this February); Dover Castle (England’s oldest fort is under 2 hours by rail from St. Pancras station); and don’t forget Hampton Court Palace.

Like a game of telephone, my message got garbled somewhere between its publication with The Atlantic and reactions posted around the web.

I was surprised to see readers literally interpreting my article’s tongue-in-cheek title, “Single People Should Get to Have Weddings, Too.” They were as quick to conjure an image of me marrying my cat as they were to ignore the three-letter word at its close: Too.

Although your relationship status naturally affects whether and when your family unit changes, the underlying question — the one that asks why we neglect to celebrate individuals — has nothing to do with your romantic choices. Whether you’re married, single, gay, straight, female or male, you have moments in your life that warrant commemoration. These fêtes might pertain to coming of age, anniversaries, weight loss and other health milestones, or professional developments. Of course, some people prefer to breeze past or quietly celebrate these achievements. Our calendars and bank accounts thank the humble stoics of the world. But some of us benefit from high-fives, toasts and gatherings of friends — external forces that help us internalize life changes — and that doesn’t make us narcissists.

We often wonder whether a falling tree makes a sound when it drops to the floor of the forest. Isn’t it the same with significant developments that only occur in our private lives? In the last month, I have: celebrated a friend’s promotion; clinked glasses to another’s engagement; attended a thirtieth birthday party bash like the one I described in my article; and relished new photos of my friends’ children. Does this mean that I marvel at every Facebook post? Of course not. I’m no more interested in the banal moments experienced by others than I am in my own day-to-day existence. But when my friend gives birth or moves cities or joins or exits a relationship, I’d like to know.

I don’t think anyone wants to draw the lines between normal and noteworthy, and I have no desire to become an arbiter of merrymaking. And although I don’t long for a world in which every achievement warrants a gold star, I’d like to promote inclusive, rather than exclusive, rituals.

At first, the defensive and angry responses to my article left me feeling befuddled, but it soon dawned on me that by promoting new traditions, I inadvertently criticized existing ones. Like many of you, I’d like to see rites (and rights — gay marriage, for one) extended to individuals who have been precluded from taking part in our longstanding conventions, but I intentionally left legal and cultural assessments of the larger institution aside when analyzing whether we possess corollary traditions for unmarried men and women.

Instead of asking that we change or dismantle existing festivities, I hoped to extend the way we conceive of certain activities and milestones. Naysayers twisted my words, making me out to be a self-centered attention glutton.

In truth, we’re all guilty of making parties about the individuals being celebrated, despite the fact that gatherings can be as meaningful for guests as they are for hosts. We carry on these traditions for a slew of reasons. As we express our support for the honored individuals, we also benefit from the excitement and camaraderie enjoyed at weddings. Besides births, funerals and graduations, they stand out as some of the only life events in which far-flung friends and relatives assemble.

Perhaps one day, my friends and family members will convene to celebrate my own wedding; perhaps not. Either way, I plan to foster traditions that honor individual advancements and achievements, big and small.

These days, conversations about violence center on gun control, but there’s a lesser evil lurking on our television screens. New reality shows romanticizing twisted relationships — including Investigation Discovery’s Deadly Women, Wicked Attraction, and Frenemies — marry violence and voyeurism.

It’s one thing to watch bloodshed rooted in history or floating in the realm of fiction, but turning actual crimes into crowd-pleasing prime time? That’s another ball game.

Investigation Discovery is our country’s fastest-growing network; it’s a dark horse with grim programming inextricably linked to people facing death. ID is brazen about occupying this bizarre niche, with a sister website — ID Addicts — for those who “crave” its sinister stories 24/7.

Alarmingly, ID isn’t the only network catering to nefarious guilty pleasures. A&E’s new series Panic 9-1-1 bills itself as “part thriller… part true-crime show,” boasting that it “takes 911 calls to a whole new level never seen or heard before on television. Unlike emergency shows of the past, viewers will live inside the calls and experience every harrowing and terrifying moment along with the caller. Every second is real.”

Although it’s hard to pinpoint the distinction between the latest genre and crime shows of the past (America’s Most Wanted, Cops, or Rescue 911), it’s clear that earlier programs attempted to add value through education, emergency preparedness, and crime-solving.

ID cultivates fear-based entertainment, but it doesn’t stop there: shows like Deadly Women go a step further by romanticizing violence. Don’t believe me? Watch the series trailer.

Several months ago, I wrote a piece for Psychology Today regarding morally ambiguous television.

Soon after, G4 invited me to discuss my position on Attack of the Show.

Like many television viewers, I love The Sopranos and Breaking Bad — those dark shows that offer entertainment and drama along with deeply flawed characters and upsetting scenarios. Notably, these stories are born out of fiction, which allows us freedom to enjoy their underlying drama without feeling guilt or shame or fear that a real person has suffered so that we might be entertained.

What do you think? Are reality/crime hybrids the wave of the future now that reality television has carved out space on our screens? Or is there something troubling about programs that merge true stories with disturbing situations? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.

Back in 2003, Sex and the City identified a cruel reality about single life: There’s no single-person’s equivalent of a wedding—a time when people travel from afar to bring you gifts and toast your life decisions.

Carrie Bradshaw said, “If you are single after graduation, there isn’t one occasion when people celebrate you” besides birthdays, which we all enjoy.

Despite a proliferation of single adults, little has changed since that episode aired nearly a decade ago: trips are not planned when we’re promoted at work, nor crystal glassware gifted when we buy our first homes. It seems that milestone celebrations are still reserved for couples and families.

It shouldn’t be that way, of course. NYU professor Eric Klinenberg wrote Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone to tell “the story of the biggest modern social change that we’ve yet to identify: the extraordinary rise of living alone.” Marriage rates have reached a record low, and adults are generally marrying and having children later in life. As a result, single people can expect later (and fewer) unions. But societal traditions are lagging behind this shift.

In the 18th edition of her etiquette guide, Emily Post acknowledges that we’re seeing “wide diversity in the family constellation” and touches upon the sensitivity of singlehood: “Some people still have trouble realizing that alone doesn’t automatically mean lonely or searching for a mate.” Post outlines protocols for occasions that celebrate single-parent families and same-sex couples but fails to include suggestions for people who are single and childless.

When will barometers of celebration reflect the growing number of singletons?

I decided to pose that question to Hallmark, which seems to have a greeting card for every imaginable occasion. Jaci Twidwell, Hallmark’s publicity manager, told me, “We don’t have any new greeting cards specific to milestones in a single adult’s life. But we do have cards for occasions that might be celebrated with a little more energy by a single person who doesn’t have things like wedding anniversaries to celebrate. New Home, New Job or New Aunt would be examples.”

This answer hints at an underlying judgment: commemorations of the individual are placeholders for more significant achievements in life. Our worth, it seems, is still measured by the people we marry and the children we bear, despite the fact that an increasing number of adults choose to live alone.

Travel giants feature themed vacations, but few incorporate trips for the solo traveler. Expedia offers romantic, adventure, gay, and green vacations, so I asked whether the company planned to tack on trips for the solitary tourist. A rep from the company responded, “Expedia doesn’t have any data or anecdotal information to share with regards to single/solo travelers.”

Still, there are some signs of hope. Smaller companies and those offering customizable products are more adept at courting single clients. Abercrombie and Kent caters to solitary travelers with “Solo Vacations,” sending guided groups of globetrotters all over the world. Other outfitters, like New York City-based Absolute Travel, believe that “exploring the world on your own brings freedom, reflection, and flexibility”.

Some entities exclusively serve single travelers. Singles Travel International matches roommates and, when possible, persuades lodgings to waive single traveler supplements. For 20 years, its affiliate, A Single Gourmet, has provided independent foodies the chance to dine with new friends.

Several cookbooks, including The Pleasure of Cooking for One and Serve Yourself, cater to solitary chefs, and a growing number of grocery stores offer portions for one. The Onion spoofed lonely diners with “Stouffers to Include Suicide Prevention Tips on Single Serve Microwaveable Meals.” Whether zapping a Lean Cuisine or chopping veggies, adult singletons will invariably note an uptick in television shows featuring single professionals (The Mindy Project and New Girl) and modern family units (Modern Family, The New Normal, and Ben & Kate). Self-help books and love coaches are becoming more popular, too, as I explored in my last piece for The Sexes, “What I Learned from Hiring a Love Coach.”

While it’s clear that some companies are capitalizing on increasingly single demographics, singletons wanting to feel celebrated will have to initiate festivities themselves. You might take your cues from Parks & Recreation’s Tom Haverford—who hits the spa on “Treat Yourself” Day—though his fête doesn’t revolve around specific life achievements.

What about borrowing from coming-of-age traditions? As children, we receive gold stars for good behavior in school and celebrate increasing maturity with bar and bat mitzvahs, debutante balls, and graduation parties.

When I approached 30 as a single woman, I decided to host a quinceañera-themed party in San Antonio, which I aptly titled “La Quinceañera Doble.” My parents, not having subsidized a wedding, offered to cover some of the expenses, and friends flew in from around the country. Although I felt a tad silly for organizing a destination birthday, the upshot was that my parents and I covered nearly all of the costs (which were nominal compared to a wedding), and no one suffered the indignity of having to wear matching chiffon gowns.

“I’m working with a love coach,” my friend Jane tells me while taking a sip of wine.

My skepticism is palpable.

“She’s not a ‘love’ coach,” Jane clarifies. “She’s a relationship expert who provides tailored advice to a handful of clients.”

For several hours, I cajole Jane into telling me everything about her guru. I learn that Caroline the coach is approximately our age (early 30s), self-trained, and currently single, which makes her an earnest, if questionable, adviser.

Although I worry about Caroline’s lack of credentials, Jane speaks highly of her, and in this era of information overload, a strong personal recommendation goes a long way. Besides, there’s no central database collating information on coaches.

(As I would later learn, Caroline deflects criticism of her unwed status by claiming that she’s in the trenches with her clients; she says singlehood makes her approachable and knowledgeable.)

By the end of dinner, I’ve decided to give Caroline a shot. I’ve hired therapists, acupuncturists, and personal trainers: Why not throw a relationship expert into the mix?

She and other love coaches seek to cultivate women’s “feminine energy,” which Caroline likens to lightheartedness and openness. In the back of my mind, I hear the voice of my mother—an affectionate southern woman who’s begged me to soften up since I was a little girl mimicking my three big brothers. This line of guidance makes me feel defensive. Why should I change? And haven’t we evolved beyond traditional gender roles and delineations?

One evening, I meet Caroline at her midtown office. We’ve agreed to spend the session reworking my Match.com profile, but I mention that I have a blind date following our meeting. I’m seeking advice and encouragement, but Caroline unleashes a blow when she asks me whether I plan to speak to my date the same way I talk to her.

I nod.

“You have this way of communicating that’s…a little aggressive,” she says. “It’s very masculine energy.”

Already frustrated by advice that seems antiquated, I am astonished when Caroline suggests that I talk to my date as though he were a seven-year old girl. I decide to stop working with her. I realized later that what I needed in that moment was a cheerleader, not a coach.

For years, I met guys organically—through school, friends, or out and about—but as time went on, the pool of single, age-appropriate men began dwindling, and avenues I’d formerly used lost effectiveness. I tried online dating, went to and organized singles mixers, and asked my friends to set me up, but I eventually confronted the fact that relationships—and the way we enter into them—are changing.

I’m not alone in sensing this shift. Writing for The Atlantic, Kate Bolick addressed a new scarcity in which successful women lack viable male counterparts. Bolick explained that “marriage-minded” women are increasingly forced to choose between “deadbeats (whose numbers are rising) and playboys (whose power is growing).”

A rash of books, TV shows, and services have arisen to help people navigate the new relationship terrain, with advice spanning the spectrum. Bravo TV’s wheelhouse includes two shows about relationship experts—Millionaire Matchmaker and Miss Advised—and ABC is preparing to air the 17th season of The Bachelor. These shows command sizeable audiences despite their nominal success in creating couples. All of Bravo’s romantic experts are currently single, except for Julia Allison of Miss Advised, who credits a coach for helping her find love, which tells me that people sometimes value camaraderie more than guidance.

Two Manhattan writers in their late twenties co-authored a guide that rejects conventional advice espoused in The Rules—a self-help book that encouraged women to take a passive approach to dating. The authors of The Gaggle dismiss traditional principles and encourage singles to embrace the “ambiguous post-dating world.” They’re of the view that casual sex, group hangouts, and aimless text messages can lead to fun, happiness, and satisfying relationships.

Conventional coaches tend to disagree with the last idea. Nancy Slotnik, author of Turn Your Cablight On, concedes that, “the world has changed such that interactions between men and women are more ambiguous,” but she insists that “dates, as a general rule, still precede relationships.” She encourages her clients to “be clear on what they are looking for in dating and settle for nothing less. Accepting the low-hanging fruit is a recipe for mediocrity in life.”

My single girl friends and I routinely debate these issues when making plans. They want to get manicures, go to art galleries, and check out swanky hotel bars. I do, too, but I also want to meet guys, so I suggest throwing sports bars into the mix and generally avoid traveling in a gaggle of women.

I’ve come under fire for thinking too strategically, which Slotnick says is unsurprising. There’s a stigma, she says, to focusing on one’s love life, even though we “we put time, effort, and strategy into every other big goal in life, including career goals, athletic endeavors, weight loss goals, and financial planning.” Why not do the same with personal relationships?

What these books and shows have in common is that they offer a set of rules and guidelines for how to find romantic happiness. This is what Caroline tried to do, as well, and while I resisted her urgings to wear high heels, I appreciated her focus on relationship proactivity. If nothing else, harnessing control of one’s love life provides energy to a cause that can feel overwhelming. Although we didn’t jibe—Caroline’s outlook was too traditional for me—I learned valuable lessons about what I don’t want and what I won’t sacrifice for companionship.

San Antonio may be the country’s seventh largest city, but many of its neighborhoods possess charm and familiarity associated with small town living. Families stick around for generations. Businesses with connections to the community thrive. And the city continues to grow—at lightning speed—without the world paying much attention.

When Elizabeth Chambers—journalist, actress, and wife of actor Armie Hammer (you might recognize him as the Winklevoss twins from Aaron Sorkin’s The Social Network)—decided to open a bakery, fond memories tugged her back to San Antonio, where she was born and where her late grandmother ran a catering company. Now operating Bird Bakery in the city’s Alamo Heights district, Chambers pays homage to her family with baked goods born out of family recipes (and she shares the recipe for their fudgy brownies below).

Chambers says that BIRD is her and Hammer’s “baby.” Speaking about their vision for the cozy eatery, Chambers says, “We are committed to making it the very best it can be. Every single recipe on the menu, every beam in the ceiling, every light fixture, the counters, the books…have our fingerprints all over them.”

Fudgy Brownies

Ingredients:
8 oz. (1 cup) unsalted Plugra butter; more softened butter for the pan
3½ oz. White Lily Flour; more for the pan
2 cups C&H fine baking sugar
½ cup of powdered sugar for dusting (optional)
4 large eggs, room temperature
¾ tsp Nielsen-Massey Madagascar Bourbon Pure Vanilla Extract
¾ cup unsweetened (non-dutched) Callebaut cocoa powder
½ tsp baking powder
½ tsp table salt
Powdered sugar, optional
Directions:
Heat oven to 350°F, and position rack to center. Butter and flour a 9-inch-square metal baking pan, tapping out excess flour.

Melt butter in a saucepan over medium heat. Remove the pan from heat. Using a whisk, add the sugar, eggs, and vanilla. With a wooden spoon, stir in the flour, cocoa, baking powder, and salt.

Stir vigorously for one minute or until batter is smooth.

Spread batter into prepared baking pan, smoothing it so it fills the pan evenly. Bake approximately 40 minutes, until a toothpick comes out with just a few moist clumps clinging to it. Let the brownies cool completely in the pan on a rack.

Once cooled, cut into 16 squares. Dust with powdered sugar, if desired.

Despite its pervasiveness, mental illness remains stigmatized. It’s estimated that a quarter of Americans suffer from some form of mental disease; by that measure, nearly all of us have personal or second-hand experience with sickness of the mind. Yet we hesitate to discuss our depressions and anxieties and the people who possess them. A recent study concluded that mental health remains the strongest cultural taboo: many people find copping to it more overwhelming than coming out of the closet.

This paradox interests me not merely because I suffer from chronic depression. As an attorney and writer, I’m interested in the way we communally confront societal problems and am of the view that popular culture is one of the safer, thus more accessible, venues for discussing difficult topics.

It’s why I watch Intervention, Breaking Bad, and a string of other shows devoted to troubled individuals and situations. These stories are immediate enough to impact us but distant enough to keep us feeling adequately removed from their underlying drama. With a proliferation of acclaimed shows featuring mentally ill characters, I can’t help but wonder what the pop culture barometer says about our emotional health.

More interesting than abundance and success is how dramatic television handles mental illness. With Homeland, viewers see that genius can underlie mental illness. Claire Danes took home an Emmy for playing Homeland’s Carrie Mathison — a bipolar CIA agent who doesn’t reveal her illness for fear of losing her security clearance and job, even though her professional achievements almost always occur during manic episodes.

Although her illness comes at a steep cost, it’s clear that Mathison’s ingenuity is inextricably linked to her bipolar disorder. Her first big break occurs in a jazz bar: she discerns a pattern in Brody’s seemingly benign hand movements, her perceptiveness encouraged by the music’s loud, spastic pulsations. Even when Mathison isn’t manic, she’s reckless. She forgoes sleep and food and regularly risks everything to pursue intuitions, but her tenacity pays off, and watching her is mesmerizing. We may want her to take better care of herself, but we also know that her success – and overall conflict resolution – depend upon the continuation of her “troubled” mental state.

A similar paradox evolved in The Killing, with Sarah Linden obsessively seeking to resolve the Rosie Larsen murder case. She too landed in the psych ward, though justice depended on her mental peculiarities.

I have to think that the gender of these mentally unstable protagonists is not accidental. Although television shows depict male protagonists coming unhinged (The Sopranos and Breaking Bad, to name a few), there’s something decidedly different about the way mentally unstable men and women are portrayed.

The men tend to verge on the psychotic – with violent and narcissistic traits. Female counterparts are emotional and intuitive.

Interestingly, Mathison seems to be the least gender-specific of any of these characters. She’s thoughtful and brash; intuitive and manipulative. Although she employs her sexuality when it’s advantageous, she doesn’t possess typically feminine trappings (children; spouse; strong friendships or family ties).

Her gender neutrality makes her a unique – and more accurate, I think – character study. What does Showtime have in store for our mentally ill protagonist? We’ll find out this season.

Ambitious restaurateurs Larry McGuire and Thomas Moorman helm the kitchen at Elizabeth Street Café, a nine-month-old Vietnamese boulangerie and café in Austin’s South Congress neighborhood that is putting a locally sourced, farm-fresh spin on Asian cuisine. “You used to have to pilgrimage to north Austin for good Vietnamese food, which is one of our favorites, with so many tastes and textures and an overall feeling of freshness,” Moorman says. So he and McGuire sought to “bring these flavors to central Austin and showcase them in an inviting, convivial space.” Although they decided to keep the menu relatively traditional, they were excited to “sneak in a few original dishes” (like the fried chicken bún below).

Both chefs grew up in the Lone Star State, so when they opened their first restaurant, Lamberts Downtown Barbecue, in 2006, it seemed natural that they’d begin by tackling barbecue. Even at the outset of their careers, the young chefs wanted to push the boundaries of culinary traditions.

“There are great by-the-pound, no-utensil barbecue joints in and around Austin,” Moorman says. “We wanted to celebrate that tradition—serving natural meats and local produce—with a thoughtful cocktail, beer and wine list. The smoker is the heart of our restaurant, but we’ve drawn inspiration from Southern and Tex-Mex cuisines to round out our ‘fancy barbecue’ menu.”

Once they’d earned accolades and a steady fan base for their downtown outpost, McGuire and Moorman set their scopes on Austin’s South Congress neighborhood, or SoCo, as it’s often called. With Perla’s Seafood and Oyster Bar, they delved into new terrain, but it didn’t take long for them to hit their stride on the other side of Town Lake. They opened Elizabeth Street Cafe in December 2011, and after baking baguettes for banh mi, decided to add a full-scale bakery to their mini-empire.

What’s next for the rockstar chefs? Since launching Elizabeth Street Café, they’ve opened a fourth enterprise: Fresa’s Chicken al Carbon, a drive-thru serving organic, locally sourced poultry. They’re also preparing to reopen Jeffrey’s—historically considered Austin’s preeminent fine dining establishment—this winter. Their success, and the rocket speed at which they’re accomplished it, bodes well for Austin’s food scene.

Head to Garden and Gun for the recipe.